It’s been 1 month since my city issued a Safer at Home ordinance. Since then, I’m bouncing between being uber-productive and “not going crazy at home”. To just sitting with my thoughts and letting my emotions get the best of me. When is this going to end? I’m exhausted from being at home. Aren’t you?

And yes, most of us are dealing with anxiety, worry, and fear when it comes to this pandemic. We wake up thinking about how COVID-19 has affected us. We worry about our health; if we or our loved ones will get infected, if not now, how about after the quarantine? We fear that we won’t have a job to go back to. How will we pay our bills, keep a roof over our heads, or buy the basic necessities? All of these thoughts are creating an overwhelming amount of anxiety. It’s exhausting to think of all of this and I have very little energy for anything else.

Is this happening to you? Is there a better way to look at the current situation besides the doom and gloom? I mean, some of the questions and worries are real. The current circumstances that we are facing bring upon these feelings and they are valid. But why worry about the future? Why should I work myself up over something that hasn’t happened yet? Do I have control over the future?

I say all of this and ask these questions because I’m struggling. I’m trying to stay level headed but it’s a challenge. I don’t know if I will be able to keep my current job. And if I don’t plan ahead, I may find myself in some serious economic distress. This is where my mental hamster wheel takes off and I can see the smoke coming out of my ears.

What a phenomenon! I’m running myself to the ground by my own thoughts and I don’t have my normal outlets to distract me. And this is where I have my Aha moment. In modern times, we’ve been focused and conditioned by external things and routines. Now, we don’t know what to do without them. And seeking the answers within ourselves seems far fetched, out of reach, or impossible.

Prior to this isolation, I’d typically think to myself “if I could only have peace and quiet to think”. I’d blame my routine, work, or external distractions for the reason of why I can’t quiet my mind. But if there is anything this imposed quarantine has given us is time to think.

And what I’ve come to understand is that there is a difference between how our mind processes thoughts. We spend more energy when we think of things that generate anxiety, fear, or worry. As opposed to thinking and reflecting on what we are grateful for, or silencing the incessant chatter in our minds.

This self-realization is what prompted this blog. I really thought I knew why I used to come home mentally drained or tired. And now that I’m home, I recognize that the reasons I came up with, are not the cause at all. The conditions might’ve changed but my mind still behaves the same. So now it is up to me to make that mental shift and take advantage of the current situation. I believe we have an opportunity here.

So I hope this piece causes you to question or self-reflect. And if you are a person that practices meditation or any other method to really dive inward, I welcome you to share your thought or suggestions.

My hope is that as a collective body we can raise our energy levels and help each other in more positive ways.